Whisking on Pens & Needles

I know that I don’t have many loyal blog readers, and at this point, being that I have not had any substantial posts in over a month, I can understand why. 

Exactly a month ago, I was shocked to discover that my husband just quit his job on the spot.  No two week notice, no notice period, nada.  At the time, I was very much in shock, as I am sure he was as well.  He had talked about doing it, but since he had talked about leaving his previous job where he stayed on for seven years, I never really thought he would actually do it.  Surprise!  Yup.  Surprise. 

Being the good wife that I am, I was wholly supportive of him leaving a soul-draining job working for a bi-polar bitch, but hell … I had put up with months of that myself before I found the job that I’m happily in now.  As miserable as I’ve been in some of my other positions, the option of leaving before I found something else was fairly non-existant.  I think I instantly went on freak out mode money-wise, since quitting right before August was probably one of the worst times he could have picked.  All our most expensive bills were due – taxes, car insurance, post-bday-party amex, ugh.  We managed to get everything paid on time, but are no longer on the path that I had planned.  No extra mortgage payments … no extra savings for my future bakery … no more shopping trips … no more trips to the organic grocery store – we were on super frugal mode.  Buy what was neccessary and nothing else.

I honestly never thought that at 30 I would be put in the position that my mother has always been in as the sole money-maker in the household.  Growing up, my mother was always the stable one, while my father had more jobs that I can count.  For the past seven years, I don’t think my father’s had a job longer than 3 months anywhere.  For the most part, my parents just skate by on my mom’s salary.  She, like me, makes enough to live on, but really not enough to justify her spouse sitting home not bringing in another income.  Savings for retirement – HA! 

So needless to say, things were pretty tense. 

Luckily, (yes, there is good news!), I was so busy with SweetElement orders, that I didn’t have time to dwell on our financial situation all too much.  The extra cash was a nice boost too.  But as you can imagine … between commuting, work and baking every night … I was pretty much running myself into the ground.  Throughout August I created some great portfolio building pieces and also had some excellent exposure in my friend Derek’s show in the Fringe Festival.  It’s almost as if the pastry gnomes were taking care of me – “As long as she’s got her hands in the flour, sugar and chocolate … she’ll hang on.” 

I’ve was also extremely fortunate to be insanely busy at my day job and surrounded by some truly awesome friends there too.  It was difficult though when I caught a free moment and started to think about eveyrthing on the home front.  I felt at times like I was teetering on the edge.  It was stay strong or completely melt down.  There were no tears at work – although it was close.  I couldn’t bear to actually put down my feelings into words because I knew that would just put me over the edge … thus, my disappearing act.

And now?

I am happy to report that Jay is employed again as an IT consultant at NYU, we received our fairly hefty Homestead rebate check, and our finances are slowly getting back in order.  I am still working through SweetElement orders as they come in, but nowhere near the level on insanity I was working through in August making petit fours.  I had a brief stint last week where I thought I might have actually found my commercial bakery space … but that didn’t pan out – the timing just wasn’t right … so I am still at my day job and banking all that I can so when the time is right I can make the switch – all on my own dollars and cents.

In the meantime, I’ve been knitting up a storm – lots of FO to post soon … and experimenting with recipes both savory and sweet with mixed success.  I won’t even go into the family drama that has been brewing in the CT horizon, but let’s just say that it ain’t pretty and it’s a big ol’ storm.

I’m hoping that now that things are back to “normal” – whatever the hell that is – I’ll be able to be back to my own swing o’ things and will be able to post again often on all the various aspects of the life that makes me, Me.

I shall leave you with the following image o’ the day …